My goal this week was drawing a cartoon version of Chris Edley, which I have done. I'm also commenting on a recent discovery that's causing my cock-eyed optimism in Boalt's future to wane.
My original vision for the Edley comic strip was an elaborate Three's Company-style misunderstanding romp. So instead I'll just present it in teleplay form.
[Dean Edley is in his office. The phone rings.]
EDLEY: Edley here.
VOICE ON PHONE: What's up, Chris! It's Cornell West from Harvard.
EDLEY: Oh. Hi, Cornell.
CORNELL: I heard about the rankings. How does it feel to be at a top 20 school?
EDLEY: It's top 15, asshole.
CORNELL: Ah, my mistake. I guess I'll call back next year and ask about the top 20 schools.
EDLEY: Fuck you, Cornell! [Hangs up.] [At that moment, BOB BERRING walks by the office just in time to hear Edley's final words to Cornell West.]
BERRING: Cornell Law School is trying to steal Edley from us! We'll see about that.
[Berring's office. Berring enters, picks up the phone, and dials a number.]
BERRING: Hello, Cornell Law School? Why the hell are you shitheads trying to steal our Dean?
VOICE ON PHONE: Who is this? Is this Berring?
BERRING: Damn right. Now you leave Edley alone. He's ours.
VOICE ON PHONE: Eat shit, Berring. We don't need to steal anything from your number 13 ass.
BERRING: Choke on cock! We're going to be in the top five! Top five, God damn it! You hear me? [Berring slams down phone and starts eating an ice cream sandwich from his desk drawer.]