I really feel for this guy. I had Verizon Wireless for two terrible years and on many occasions I found myself at least fantasizing about demolishing Verizon Wireless stores and employees. Verizon Wireless employees are among those rare customer service personnel who are all at once (1) surly, (2) dismissive, and (3) profoundly unhelpful. They're like CompUSA employees on a bad day. I'll never forget the time I went to the Santa Monica VW store to pay my wireless bill and was told that I couldn't pay it there because my plan was issued in Northern California. Apparently this telecommunications company hasn't advanced to the point where different stores in the same state can communicate with each other.
But even more entertaining are the crimes the guy is charged with: "Felony criminal mischief" and "misdemeanor simple assault." I love the fact that assault is the misdemeanor and mischief is the felony.
According to the North Dakota Criminal Code, a person is guilty of criminal mischief if that person: (a) Willfully tampers with tangible property of another so as to endanger person or property; or (b) Willfully damages tangible property of another.
And let's not forget the Notes of Decisions:
A defendant who, being pursued by police, drove into and through a bean field in an attempt to escape, could be convicted of criminal mischief for the damage to the bean field. State v. Erdman, 422 N.W.2d 808 (N.D. 1988).
Do I love North Dakota? Yoooo betcha.