Much has transpired since my holiday Sharper Image debacle, and now the matter seems to have finally come to rest. After I received the fancy hairbrush and electronic joke machines and called the Sharper Image to complain, they said they'd send a UPS person to come pick up the items when my Bar Master arrived. The Bar Master came and no pick up was made. So, I called again and explained the situation and asked them if they wanted their $111 worth of shit back. Meli, meanwhile, was enjoying the increasing possibility of her getting a free fancy hairbrush out of the deal.
While I was on the phone with the Sharper Image guy I tried to explain the situation as best I could, and after taking the order number he said he'd send me a paid postage label and would I please take the box down to the post office where it would be shipped with no charge. I agreed and hung up. About twenty minutes later I realized that I hadn't given him my name or address, and it was exceedingly likely that the postage label would be sent to Palm City, Florida (the original intended destination of the misdirected package). Meli and I agreed to give it ten days. If the label didn't show up, the hairbrush would be ours, and the joke machines would be gifted to children whose parents we didn't like.
Within a week, the postage label miraculously appeared in our mailbox, dashing all hopes of free Sharper Image merchandise. I prepared the package and shipped it off, think that was that. Then, a week ago, I got a postcard from the Sharper Image which read as follows:
Dear Sharper Image Customer:
The merchandise you returned was received on the date indicated on the reverse side of this card.
As requested, your credit, refund, or exchange is being processed. All credit card credits should be reflected on your next monthly statement. Please allow two weeks for an exchange and ten days for a refund check.
Thank you for ordering from The Sharper Image.
Keep in mind, at this point I've already had the Bar Master for several weeks, and by now I'm done playing with it and will likely never pick it up again. Still, it's been delivered and their obligation to me has been fulfilled. So when I got the postcard I could only hope that the geniuses at Sharper Image were going to send me a check for the value of the returned merchandise -- $111 -- which I would definitely keep.
Today, however, I received another parcel from the Sharper Image. And inside it was... another Bar Master. So now I have two, one of which will become a birthday present for someone we don't feel like shopping for.
So there's that. And, as always, seven curses with it.