Apple Now Officially Jerkier than Microsoft: An Illustrated Story of Despair and Frustration

| 20 Comments

I'm going to refrain from discussing the unbelievably dick move of bundling Quicktime 7 with iTunes. For now, I'd like to tell the story of me trying to watch the trailer for X-Men 3 on my computer. Even after reinstalling Quicktime (and iTunes!), I get this:

After Googling "quicktime question mark" and reading about other poor fools with similar problems, I end up at the well-hidden Quicktime Troubleshooting page, where I find this profoundly unhelpful rectangle of fury:

From this we learn (1) Quicktime is successfully installed, (2) there's "a problem with the way [my] network is configur[ated], and (3) Apple can't be bothered to provide a direct link to the sub-area of the Quicktime support area that discusses the problem. This is probably because no such area exists.

My network never had any problems with previous versions of Quicktime. I used to play Quicktime movies like it was going out of style. In the process of updating the program and entangling it with iTunes, Apple seems to have made Quicktime incompatible with my (and presumably other people's) Inter-net provider, and is now blaming the networks. Thanks, Steve!

Why won't the movie studios release trailers for Windows Media Player? Why are we still waiting for a major competitor for the iPod? When can we finally drive Apple into the ground? How long must I wait?

In the meantime I'm consoling myself with the thought that X-Men 3 will probably be ass, since Nightcrawler doesn't seem to have returned, Storm is rumored to be the focal character, Bryan Singer is off directing Superman: The Jesus Version, and Bret "Rush Hour" Rattner has resorted to blowing up the Golden Gate Bridge to artificially enbiggen the scope of the movie (or "film"). It looks like it'll be X-Men 3: A Tedious Disaster Film Starring Kelsey Grammer as Beast. And still no love for Gambit. The whole world is against me.

20 Comments

Yes, Matt. You're right. The whole world is against you. No, really, the entire world. We're all together on this one.

About a year ago, I was watching TV with my little sister. Kelsey Grammer was on an awards show, and I said, "Wow, Kelsey Grammer. I wonder what he's doing these days." Without missing a beat, Molly said, "A lot of cocaine."

Creative is coming out with this, which looks fairly cool:

http://www.engadget.com/entry/1234000157071380/

I guess I was lucky in that the new Quicktime did actually work for me.

It's about time the X-Men movies focused on Storm! What a crime to underuse a talented Oscar winning actress like that! No, just kidding, she sucks.

But I believe you are forgetting about Brett Ratner's sex whore mutant with sexy sexerpowers of sex! X3 will be sextastic! Or should I say "sextasex"? ;)

The people at Apple have been dicks for a long time. Welcome to the bandwagon. I have an iBook, which I'd love to death if it ever went two months without completely self-destructing and then have the people at Apple giving me blank, dead stares as to why.

Don't tell me X3 is going to suck. I know it's going to suck, but the thought that the last one will be a dead weight for the entire series makes me want to cry hot tears of shame. Did you notice Bryan Singer just put out a three part mini-series on SciFi called The Triangle? As soon as I saw his name associated with it I ran to my TiVo. I've only watched the first part, but it's pretty good so far. Though if you ask me, anything Singer touches turns to gold.

My boyfriend, the big comic book geek said that if they're going to delve into the Phoenix Saga storyline in X3, that Storm actually has a large role in it. Back when Halle (and I agree, she is way over-rated.) was holding out for more money and they were thinking about dropping her from the movie all together, he was wondering how they were going to do it and still remain true to the franchise without her character present. I'm psyched for Angel to be in it, though I think Ben Foster is an odd casting choice.

As for Apple, I've been a happy convert for the last 2 years and haven't had one problem with my Powerbook except for a failed logic board after the first year, but I had the 3-year warranty and they fixed it right up.

The more I think about it, the more red flags X-Men 3 seems to have. It just seems like it's going to be a very abrupt break from the first two films, much like Schumacher's deplorable Batman Forever. It probably won't be as bad (Schumacher can only be worsted by Schumacher himself, viz. Batman & Robin), but it still looks like Ratner is taking a successful franchise and putting his own stink on it just because he can. Like where the hell did Magneto get an army of evil mutants all of a sudden? Didn't he only have two followers at the end of X2?

I didn't realize Singer was involved with The Triangle. I probably would have watched it if I had known. As it stood, Faramir wasn't enough to draw me in. I'm still not sold on Superman, though. I never found that character very compelling and I can't remember the last time Kevin Spacey (now appearing as Lex Luthor) failed to disappoint me.

Oh, and the fact that Maggie Grace almost played Shadowcat, but didn't because ABC wouldn't let her but then killed her off anyway, makes me even more resentful of the whole thing.

As for Ratner putting his own stink on things, check this out.

Brett Ratner is spicing up the new X-Men 3 movie with the addition of his very own fantasy - a sex siren mutant who seduces her opponents rather than battles them. Ratner takes over from departing director Bryan Singer, who made the first two movies, and the Rush Hour film maker is determined to leave his mark on the comic book series. The new mutant has not yet been cast but unknowns Kate Nauta and Aya Sumika will reportedly audition. A source tells Pagesix.com the mutant will be, "An unbelievably hot and sexy hooker. Her super power is that she secretes a pheromone that helps her to seduce men. She can seduce anyone." The source adds of the auditions, "They are open to all ethnicities who are in their early-to-mid 20s."

You take back what you said about Batman Forever. It is the best batman hands down and I will wrestle whoever says different.

Prior to Batman Begins, Tom, you may have had an argument there. Now, there is no more debate. Unless you are being sarcastic, in which case, well played.

Clint, that was the sexy mutant I was talking about.

thank god they're finally inventing a woman character whose power lies in her sex pocket. because all these women fighting with the power of their brains was kind of boring.

holohan, magneto had THREE followers at the end of x2. because he ran off with the kid. and that kid, he was clearly a breeder. he probably fathered an army with the sex-pocket mutant.

Right. The kid and Mystique. Who's the third follower? Mystique was the only one left at the end of X-men, and Magneto didn't pick anyone else up in X-2. Even if he had designs on Deathstrike she died when Wolverine pumped her full of adamantium, but not before her eyes turned brown and we felt bad because she wasn't really evil.

the third follower was me, matt.

brown eyed girls are never evil. that is why we have a song about us.

I think that was actually the first song I ever learned to play on the guit-tar. In high school I also changed the lyrics into a song about the water cycle for a biology project.

It was originally supposed to be "Brown Skinned Girl", but I think they had to change it so radio stations would play it. She does like to tan a lot, though, so I say she's still not evil.

a very sub-tle claim sean. unless you're not lying in which case, ok.

Apple is a bunch of jerks. My mom has a Mac. She can't use any websites anymore, however, because she has OSX 10.2 and all websites are now requiring newer browsers that are compatible with 10.3 and up. Of course, you have to BUY 10.3! And she can't update her IE, because they discontinued IE for Mac. So now she's stuck with a barely functional computer. I mean, the primary function of a computer is to access the internet. Really, we'd all be far less dependent on them with out it.

Tell your mom to install Firefox. It's not Apple's fault your mom doesn't know how to use a computer.

Compared with the shittiness of Microsoft's products, Apple is a godsend. I don't think you can really fault them for the occasional problem -- which is most likely being caused by Windows anyway.

Also, God help the man that buys Creative products.

Dr v - I thought you had rejected macs and joined the one true path.

I'm using my blackberry to post this comment!

AMEN AMEN AMEN!!!

This is such bullshit. I just want to watch the damn trailer. What, did I sit here all this time to download and install Apple's shitty product just so it won't work?

I'll be glad when the day comes that Hollywood decides to try a WMV format for their trailers.

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This page contains a single entry by hb published on December 10, 2005 9:47 PM.

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