Business Cas Usual


My summer of fake lawyering began yesterday. I'm still figuring out the dress code. I realize they're trying to be nice to us but I can't shake the feeling that life would be simpler if they'd just make us wear suits every day.

Yesterday was the big office tour, and I learned that the Menlo Park office of the law firm has a complete cafe, showers, an exercise room, and a place to drop of laundry and dry cleaning. What does this say to me? "You'll never have to leave the office!" All we need are cots. Or maybe couches. Big enough to hump on.

Since I've been unable to take my vitamins every day, Molly bought me a jar of "Gummi Vites," which are vitamins in gummi bear form. I'm supposed to take four every day, which I can handle. Unfortunately the jar that's supposed to live in my desk at the office spent the day in the trunk of my car, so by the end of the day I had a big melty gummi blob. This wouldn't be an issue if I wasn't supposed to eat exactly four each day, but as it stands I'm going to have to eyeball it and pull off a chaw of gummi once a day.

Anyway, the actual work begins tomorrow afternoon. Time to get out my competition-crushing pants.


I had my first day at my internship yesterday; the Stanford guy showed up in a full pin-stripe suit while the rest of us were in slacks and semi-casual tops. However, I don't think that I'm going to dress even that nicely again, especially since all us interns are sitting at the "penthouse", which is just a glorified breakroom on the top floor, well away from all the real workers where no one can see us and where we we will be virtually unsupervised all day. I'm also going to bring headphones and use a computer where no one can see me using IM. What firm are you working for? Good luck w/ your Gummi chaw.

Keep ties in your drawer, pre-tied but loose, so you can slip one on if that crazy guy who wants interns to have ties shows up. One of those blazer jackets would be good too, if somebody suddenly comes up and asks if you want to go to court to watch, as opposed to doing work. Or if you need to impersonate a Young Republican. Whichever.

My lawyer boss has an emergency tie on a doorknob in his office, and a super-emergency jacket in his closet, so B's advice is quite sound.

If you eat extra Gummi vitamin bears, you will surely die. Be careful.

now how are you going to be able to separate the peanut bears from the rest of the bears? curse you, the sun, with your melting rays!

When I despairingly provided Matt with the gummi vites, he assured me that these are his "training" vitamins to get him into the routine of vitamin taking. And he *melts* them? I'm not the one who chose the husband with all the delicate health issues-- okay, well maybe I am, but he's the one *with* the delicate health issues!

I, for one, have not worn underwear once!

Sean, I didn't know Matt Z. had a closet in his office! I woulda used it for office hide-and-seek.

apparently the hippies over at berkeley's ecology law firm each keep an emergency suit in the office. they also keep a slobbering black labrador in the office. has anyone ever had an asthma attack during a job interview while they lied about how much they love dogs? because i have.

It's hard to say which type of Berzerkleyan bothers me more: the dirty hippies or the everything-o-phobes.

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This page contains a single entry by hb published on May 25, 2004 9:30 PM.

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