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(1) I will never forgive whoever came up with the "got milk?" commercials for causing the plague of anti-creative "got _____?" sloganry and merchandise that has irreversibly overtaken the world. However, the latest "got milk?" ad, with the Russian family and the Pillsbury Doughboy, is fucking awesome.

(2) Mylanta has become the latest company to advertise with a song that says the opposite of what it appears to say. The new Mylanta spot has a guy looking forlornly into a pizza restaurant because he can't eat pizza anymore because of heartburn, and then he discovers Mylanta and is able to eat pizza again. As he enjoys his pizza (in a way that makes this viewer sort of uncomfortable), the theme from Welcome Back, Kotter plays, including the line "Welcome back, your dreams were your ticket out." The whole point of that song was that Kotter doesn't necessarily want to come back, so the song is sarcastically making fun of him. Mylanta is idiots.

(3) I just saw a Circuit City commercial in which the spokesman was unmistakably Mikey from Parker Lewis Can't Lose. A few years ago Mikey did a beer commercial in which he was making out with a hot girl on his couch and his phone rings, leading to an audible message from a sexy-voiced woman who says something along the lines of "Hey, sweetie, I'll be over at around eight o'clock." Upon hearing this the hot girl slaps Mikey and huffily leaves the apartment. The next thing we see is a frumpy old maid cleaning Mikey's apartment as Mikey sips a beer on the couch. The maid says to him, in the sexy voice from the answering machine, "Move your feet, sweetie." Hurr! Anyway, Mikey has gone from young-guy-making-out-with-and-possibly-cheating-on-hot-girl to overwhelmed-imbecile-husband-who-can't-figure-out-all-this-newfangled-television-technology. And yet he's still wearing the flannel. In any case he doesn't appear to have aged well.